Comment by dragonwriter

> Let me make sure I understand your logic:

I'm pretty sure you have not only failed to understand your interlocutors logic, but failed to understand how your "And you let her do that?" reads, and would better (presuming the question you seem to think you asked judging from this followup is what you actually meant to ask) phrased, "And have you done anything to dissuade her from this course of action?"

What you actually asked treats the spouse as an infant or chattel to be controlled, and is the reason you got the negative response that you got.