Comment by macNchz
2 years ago
My wife has a copy of the DSM 5 on our bookshelf, and flipping through it I noted that very many disorders have diagnostic criteria that, beyond just having some symptoms, they cause significant distress or impairment of functioning.
I had a friend growing up who was diagnosed with ADHD quite young whose experience was similar to your story–he had major issues with school that ultimately led to him being expelled, not going to college, having trouble with work and family etc. I thought of him a lot as so many of my classmates in a hyper-competitive school environment discussed how they could get a diagnosis and medication to have an edge on college admissions or whatever.
Its the significant distress or impairment which is key. As an example most people will put off doing things like sorting out an issue with their electricity provider, but I took that to the degree where I only sorted it when someone literally turned up on my doorstep to disconnect the supply.
Throughout my life I've found myself in situations where most people would go "well, this seems to be getting out of hand" and just carried on, getting ever more stressed and angry and seemingly being unable to get on with fixing it, whilst variously losing jobs, friendships, and a marriage. It was honestly a huge relief to discover the likely cause is ADHD rather than just being a failure of a human being.