i know therapy has helped a lot of people in my personal life, which is why i tried it, but i think it really made me feel alone that the only person i can talk to is someone that i pay to listen to me.
i went to therapy for 2 years with this perspective that the therapist would fix me like the mechanic fixes my car. I spent 2 hours a week with a psychiatrist & therapist bitching about my life thinking eventually I would get "better".
but then i realized that wasn't getting any better. it's not their responsibility to "fix" me. the only person that could help me was me.
the first thing we reach for is an external solution to solve or escape our current problems and everything is so commoditized that there is something that we can fixate our attention on.
i think that reflecting this fixation inward has made all the difference for me personally.
The hard part is finding a therapist that works for you.
Therapy is such a broad spectrum from psychoanalysis to behavior therapy. It is very unlikely that you just click with the first therapist that you visit, it can take years to find someone.
Two years without any tangible progress sound extremely unethical from the therapist. Yes, therapy takes time but it still something you do for a fixed time period with hopefully clear goals where you track your progress.
And yes, the actual work is done by the patient. Just like a personal trainer can not just work out for you.
Therapy isn’t a social relationship. What you’re paying for is someone to be non judgmental as you unpack things. They can help talk you througj it. Friends don’t know how/wouldn’t want to do that.
I mean yeah? He clearly needs to talk to someone and feels isolated. A neutralish third party to talk to (and is trained to help!) is a excellent suggestion. Therapy isn't a cure all, and is expensive (not that it matters in this case) but your comment sounds like:
> The modern cure to all problems. Going to the gym if you feel unfit. Incredible insight.
What for? Because I don't want kids? And what could they possibly say to fix the world? I can re-consider after we get rid of Putin, Trump, and Xi and fix the economy to a place where I don't constantly have to hear how people can't afford homes or even food.
Before that you are irresponsible to bring new people into this world and should be ashamed.
The modern cure to all problems. Pay someone to talk to you. Incredible insight.
i know therapy has helped a lot of people in my personal life, which is why i tried it, but i think it really made me feel alone that the only person i can talk to is someone that i pay to listen to me.
i went to therapy for 2 years with this perspective that the therapist would fix me like the mechanic fixes my car. I spent 2 hours a week with a psychiatrist & therapist bitching about my life thinking eventually I would get "better".
but then i realized that wasn't getting any better. it's not their responsibility to "fix" me. the only person that could help me was me.
the first thing we reach for is an external solution to solve or escape our current problems and everything is so commoditized that there is something that we can fixate our attention on.
i think that reflecting this fixation inward has made all the difference for me personally.
The hard part is finding a therapist that works for you.
Therapy is such a broad spectrum from psychoanalysis to behavior therapy. It is very unlikely that you just click with the first therapist that you visit, it can take years to find someone.
Two years without any tangible progress sound extremely unethical from the therapist. Yes, therapy takes time but it still something you do for a fixed time period with hopefully clear goals where you track your progress.
And yes, the actual work is done by the patient. Just like a personal trainer can not just work out for you.
Therapy isn’t a social relationship. What you’re paying for is someone to be non judgmental as you unpack things. They can help talk you througj it. Friends don’t know how/wouldn’t want to do that.
What therapy did was give me a framework by which to debug myself.
He's got the money, I don't see how talking to a professional could make things worse
I mean yeah? He clearly needs to talk to someone and feels isolated. A neutralish third party to talk to (and is trained to help!) is a excellent suggestion. Therapy isn't a cure all, and is expensive (not that it matters in this case) but your comment sounds like:
> The modern cure to all problems. Going to the gym if you feel unfit. Incredible insight.
What for? Because I don't want kids? And what could they possibly say to fix the world? I can re-consider after we get rid of Putin, Trump, and Xi and fix the economy to a place where I don't constantly have to hear how people can't afford homes or even food.
Before that you are irresponsible to bring new people into this world and should be ashamed.