Comment by bayindirh
10 months ago
> Humans have a very, very tough time assuming the point of view of another. That is the root of terrible communication, but assumptions are right up there as a big second.
That's very true. I recommend some people to read "The Four Agreements", because that thin book has real potential to improve people's lives through active and passive communication.
Also worth being aware of Robert Kagen's adult development model [0] or something similar; that gives people a framework to go from "humans seem" to some actual percentages and capabilities.
Spoiler, but approximately 66% of the adult population make do without being able to maintain their own perspective independently of what their social circle tells them it is. I imagine that would make it extremely challenging to determine what someone else's perspective is. Especially if that perspective is being formed based on empiricism rather than social signalling.
And if we're making book recommendations, Non-Violent Communication is a gem of an idea.
[0] https://medium.com/@NataliMorad/how-to-be-an-adult-kegans-th...
That's pretty fascinating, thanks for sharing it! It's a pretty compelling explanation as to why some people seem to be completely unable to logically explain their reasoning for certain beliefs and just fall back to "well it should be so because everybody says so."
Ta. I learned about it from my favourite HN comment (https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=40856578) and have spent the last 6 months wondering why people don't bring it up more. It may just be a model but it has much explanatory power for why there seem to be so many "stupid" people around. I don't really have the word to describe them; people who are technically reasonable but not convinced by arguments or evidence.