Comment by contrarian1234
5 days ago
Assuming the "power distance" is pre-existing - I find honorifics make it much easier to challenge someone in authority. If you start with a Mr/Mrs Blah or Professor Blah and then present critcism.. it typically comes off better. B/c you are showing you're not too chummy and you're strongly implying you respect them (at least somewhat).
Ex: You're in a lecture and you tell your professor "Professor X, I think on slide 10 there is a mistake". This comes off much better than "Hey Bob, I think there is a mistake on slide 10"
So at least personally, if appropriate, I default to using honorifics b/c it makes people feel better. (Unless they for some reason want to be seen as your peer - which does happen rarely)
Yeah in my personal experience I like honorifics for the same reason. Not possible in English but in the other languages I know I make it a point to address everyone (except family and friends) with the higher honorific. Especially restaurant staff or other service workers. Sometimes I wish English had an easy way for me to convey "I respect you" as subtext.
>Sometimes I wish English had an easy way for me to convey "I respect you" as subtext.
I find that sir/ma'am plus politeness (please, thank you, etc.) works nicely.
While there is the chance that you might misgender someone with that, that's not very common (at least for me) as long as you, you know, pay attention.
That said unless they have a note tattooed on their forehead with their preferred term of address, I can only use non-language cues to determine the appropriate term.
On the rare occasions where I use the wrong term and am corrected, I am fastidious in adhering to the requested term(s).
None of that's is rocket surgery, just simple respect for other humans IMHO.