Comment by GavCo
2 days ago
This is cute, but in all seriousness it would be much more effective to shout "I'm a winner"
Research:
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3354773/ – Low self-esteem + rejection hurts self-control
- https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/2007_Power... – Self-criticism predicts less goal progress
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9916102/ – Social exclusion slows inhibitory control
- https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1191... – Low teen self-esteem → poorer self-control
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8768475/ – Meta-analysis links shame to regulation drops
- https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28810473/ – Self-compassion boosts self-regulation
- https://www.researchgate.net/publication/312138882_Self-Cont... – Ego threats deplete self-control resources
- https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21632968/ – Self-criticism tied to worse goal progress
- https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-025-96476-8 – Low self-respect → low self-control → problems
Remember to be kind to yourself.
But the point is you aren't a winner if you are unlocking social media. You are opening the gate to loserdom. I'm not sure how the I'm a winner concept would apply here using one of the four methods of operant conditioning.
The research stands, but the practical application of his app is based on a Positive Punishment operant conditioning.
> you aren't a winner if you are unlocking social media. You are opening the gate to loserdom
That is not a psychologically healthy way to frame this.
And I think it’s a stretch to say that screaming “I’m a loser” is positive punishment, which seems just as likely to reinforce negative self beliefs that lead to the outcomes described in the parent comment’s research and opposite of what the user presumably wants.
To your point, just flipping this around to “I’m a winner” doesn’t seem quite right either. But more importantly, reinforcing the idea that “I’m a loser” seems counterproductive either way.
> And I think it’s a stretch to say that screaming “I’m a loser” is positive punishment
A positive punishment is giving the subject something they don’t like. For example corporeal punishment.
A negative punishment is taking away something the subject does like. For example food.
Importantly punishments need to happen after the unwanted behavior. So being punished before the behavior occurs doesn’t make any sense.
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Positive in the conditioning sense just means "something you have to do" where a negative punishment would be something being removed. It doesn't specify if the outcome is bad or good
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Just because surveys say X = Y it doesn't necessary mean it has to apply to everyone's mindset.
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> To your point, just flipping this around to “I’m a winner” doesn’t seem quite right either. But more importantly, reinforcing the idea that “I’m a loser” seems counterproductive either way.
Maybe the solution would be to have to shout something embarrassing but not deprecating towards your own self-worth. Like “I eat spaghetti through my nose” or “my poop comes out really soft”. You’d certainly avoid using social media in public.
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> That is not a psychologically healthy way to frame this.
But lying to yourself is so much worse. Eventually you won’t hold the illusion anymore and you’ll crash hard. It’s better to be honest and grounded in reality if you want any improvement to be sustainable
Yes - but then you go into the vicious cycle. Something in the line of The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry:
Why are you drinking? — the little prince asked.
- In order to forget — replied the drunkard.
- To forget what? — inquired the little prince, who was already feeling sorry for him.
- To forget that I am ashamed — the drunkard confessed, hanging his head.
- Ashamed of what? — asked the little prince who wanted to help him.
- Ashamed of drinking! — concluded the drunkard, withdrawing into total silence.
---
What helps is self-forgiveness and being gentle towards oneself. (I also was in the mode of guilt-tripping myself; and still, I do that often. But it does not help.)
I imagine what the OP meant is that when you feel you are wasting time on Social Media, if you say "I am a winner / I am better than this" (or something more positive), it will block the social media for you. So basically the reverse.
What suggests that shouting "I am a winner" is less annoying than shouting "I am a loser"? In fact, not just less annoying, but it has to be pleasant as in that scenario you would have to scream it while you are already struggling with impulse control. Even the slightest reason to not to do so would see you not do it in that type of situation.
“Don't speak negatively about yourself, even as a joke. Your body doesn't know the difference. Words are energy and they cast spells, that's why it's called spelling. Change the way you speak about yourself, and you can change your life.”
- Bruce Lee
If you’re addicted to scrolling social media then you’ll just get used to calling yourself a loser to get another fix. Or you just uninstall the extension.
There needs to be a healthier alternative to that replaces the social media habit, that is reinforced by enjoying it. I do this by reading books I wouldn’t normally read, which also gives me a reason to browse indie bookshops.
Punishments need to follow unwanted behavior, not precede them. This is a technically interesting demo but it isn’t effective.
Then the command should probably be "I summon you to open the gate to loserdom!"
You're on social media.
I have on some occasions been tempted to wire up a shock collar to myself (or equivalent) and do some experiment for things like not visiting social media websites during certain times, but I find myself concerned that I may be reaching way, way further down the metaphorical "brain stack" than I really intend with that and could do some seriously weird things to myself in the process. So far I've always judged that risk as greater than the reward.
Yelling "I'm a loser" too much reminds me of that, though on a different level of the "brain stack". I get the sentiment, and I understand the somewhat playful intent, but quite seriously I'd suggest something more neutral at the very least. Maybe it's completely harmless, but that's clearly the best case scenario, and it goes down hill fast after that. "First, do no harm" strikes me as relevant here, and important as ever.
hmm, maybe
"social media is for losers, and I'm a winner!"
might be both comedic and positive?
Maybe that's a little too close to the WINNERS DON'T USE DRUGS! splash screens that dominated the video games of my youth. We all snickered at those and I don't think it made a bit of difference. Dunno. Heck of a thing to holler when you're on the bus or whatever before you can get your fix, that's for sure.
For sure, important to be kind to yourself.
But screaming "I'm a winner" doesn't do it either, and is perhaps even more undermining
Everyone knows if you yourself have to say "I'm randomPositiveAttribute", whether it is "winner", "genius", "brilliant", "good-looking", etc., you are NOT that — you are just a loser trying to tell everyone you are somehow a winner.
Perhaps the best thing to yell is the most straightforward — "Unlock Social Media Now!". It doesn't overtly characterize you, it honestly exposes your weakness, which is probably a more powerful shaming de-motivator.
Then it would be even simpler to build an app, because if you shout "I'm a winner", the extension doesn't need to do anything at all, just keep everything blocked as before...
Be kind to yourself, but think through the problem before sending a week worth of research articles.
It could work if they were rewarded for not opening social media. Otherwise that doesn’t make sense.
If only there was an API to only allow closing an app on a specific condition.
Then you could make it so the pain was in leaving to go back to other work, so you'd enter knowing it would not be an easy exit. (But you'd get to yell self-affirming things on exit :) )