I tripped a lot in my early 20s, a whole lot, and never had a bad time. Well, I had some uncomfortable experiences, but not what I can now call a bad trip.
One of my first times after, in my experience, I literally went to hell. I was convinced I was on the outskirts, all the people at the party around me were demons, I was about to be tortured forever, and I was never going to see my son again and he was going to grow up without me..
I convinced myself I was in that position because I had wrecked and killed someone, and my punishment was forever replaying the experiencing of a life where I would grow up to have a son, only to have him ripped away from me, reminded of what I did, and then tortured for some nearly eternal amount of time....
Any conversations people had with me at the time, I heard the words they were saying but completely twisted the meaning of the words to fit whatever crazy narrative was going on in my head.
This has happened 4 or 5 times. Despite being familiar with the experience, in my mind it just reinforces that I am in a "loop" at the time, about to be tortured again..
It's happened with LSD, Mushrooms, and surprisingly even ketamine. *edit it also happened during an intense changa experience with a shaman in Tijuana, which was my most intense experience with anything to date..
You'd think I would not take this stuff anymore =p
I have at least slowed down considerably...
I have had an incredibly similar experience, including falling back into being convinced I was in a 'loop' when my mind was tired or on psychedelics. I've always found it interesting how common this type of bad trip is and wondered if there's a reason why it's so common. Cultural context can have a large impact on the type of trips you have, but I would not have guessed that western culture would create this type of bad trip, in particular.
Regarding your trip to hell, I'm interested to know if you have a lifelong belief in heaven and hell, or if it came by itself during the trip.
As an atheist with no supernatural beliefs (that I know of), I wonder if a trip on LSD for me would just be boring, or if these supernatural things become real during a trip even if you don't truly believe in them.
It's unlikely you'd find it boring simply because you're an atheist. The experience is typically quite intense, although it's dose-dependent as well as setting-dependent. I'm agnostic but my own experience was a heightened sense of panpsychism which went away later, because my rational, scientific mind didn't find the idea highly plausible.
You don't need religion or other beliefs - LSD has a strong body high, it feels good even if you don't get strong visual hallucinations. I gather that there are strong conditioning effects that determine what people see when they do hallucinate though - you won't encounter anything you had no concept of in the first place.
Interestingly, In 2006 I had both the best and worst night of my life (up to that point, this was pre-fatherhood) while on acid... but the acid wasn't really the primary factor in either direction..
Some of the best raves of the late 90s and early 2000s were at The State Palace Theater in New Orleans.. At the last party thrown there, I was invited to play first on the main stage, biggest soundsystem and crowd I ever played for, all my friends there to support.. Set goes great, we all hug and celebrate and and start tripping, and have a great time..
At about 4AM I go to get something in my record bag that I left on the stage by the decks.. someone stole it. It also had my car keys in it, among other things..
My buddy had to drive me 3+ hours away to get my spare keys, and hours back, and hours back home again, it was two days after the party before I finally settled in at home, without most of my keys and my stuff.
I had a friend who recorded and took pictures during my set, but in a different incident at the party, he dropped the camera in a literal hole in the floor of this dilapidating building, never to be seen again.
Despite being the worst feeling of my life, and being on acid, it wasn't a "bad trip" because it wasn't the trip's fault...
I would be interested to hear about your experiences.
username at gmail if you'd rather not share here.
I tripped a lot in my early 20s, a whole lot, and never had a bad time. Well, I had some uncomfortable experiences, but not what I can now call a bad trip.
One of my first times after, in my experience, I literally went to hell. I was convinced I was on the outskirts, all the people at the party around me were demons, I was about to be tortured forever, and I was never going to see my son again and he was going to grow up without me..
I convinced myself I was in that position because I had wrecked and killed someone, and my punishment was forever replaying the experiencing of a life where I would grow up to have a son, only to have him ripped away from me, reminded of what I did, and then tortured for some nearly eternal amount of time....
Any conversations people had with me at the time, I heard the words they were saying but completely twisted the meaning of the words to fit whatever crazy narrative was going on in my head.
This has happened 4 or 5 times. Despite being familiar with the experience, in my mind it just reinforces that I am in a "loop" at the time, about to be tortured again..
It's happened with LSD, Mushrooms, and surprisingly even ketamine. *edit it also happened during an intense changa experience with a shaman in Tijuana, which was my most intense experience with anything to date..
You'd think I would not take this stuff anymore =p I have at least slowed down considerably...
I have had an incredibly similar experience, including falling back into being convinced I was in a 'loop' when my mind was tired or on psychedelics. I've always found it interesting how common this type of bad trip is and wondered if there's a reason why it's so common. Cultural context can have a large impact on the type of trips you have, but I would not have guessed that western culture would create this type of bad trip, in particular.
Regarding your trip to hell, I'm interested to know if you have a lifelong belief in heaven and hell, or if it came by itself during the trip.
As an atheist with no supernatural beliefs (that I know of), I wonder if a trip on LSD for me would just be boring, or if these supernatural things become real during a trip even if you don't truly believe in them.
It's unlikely you'd find it boring simply because you're an atheist. The experience is typically quite intense, although it's dose-dependent as well as setting-dependent. I'm agnostic but my own experience was a heightened sense of panpsychism which went away later, because my rational, scientific mind didn't find the idea highly plausible.
You don't need religion or other beliefs - LSD has a strong body high, it feels good even if you don't get strong visual hallucinations. I gather that there are strong conditioning effects that determine what people see when they do hallucinate though - you won't encounter anything you had no concept of in the first place.
I am definitely influenced by Christianity..
Regardless of your beliefs, whatever your experience, I highly doubt you would find it "boring".
I can't even imagine that really, it would take a very boring person.
I've heard a lot of acid stories, but never "I was just kind of bored"
I've had remarkably similar bad trips, unfortunately I didn't make it out as unscathed.
I tell people: I had both the best day of my life, and the worst day of my life on psychedelics.
Interestingly, In 2006 I had both the best and worst night of my life (up to that point, this was pre-fatherhood) while on acid... but the acid wasn't really the primary factor in either direction..
Some of the best raves of the late 90s and early 2000s were at The State Palace Theater in New Orleans.. At the last party thrown there, I was invited to play first on the main stage, biggest soundsystem and crowd I ever played for, all my friends there to support.. Set goes great, we all hug and celebrate and and start tripping, and have a great time..
At about 4AM I go to get something in my record bag that I left on the stage by the decks.. someone stole it. It also had my car keys in it, among other things..
My buddy had to drive me 3+ hours away to get my spare keys, and hours back, and hours back home again, it was two days after the party before I finally settled in at home, without most of my keys and my stuff.
I had a friend who recorded and took pictures during my set, but in a different incident at the party, he dropped the camera in a literal hole in the floor of this dilapidating building, never to be seen again.
Despite being the worst feeling of my life, and being on acid, it wasn't a "bad trip" because it wasn't the trip's fault...
I would be interested to hear about your experiences. username at gmail if you'd rather not share here.
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