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Comment by pfannkuchen

12 hours ago

With guys who are in prestigious/powerful corporate positions, I wonder if there is a fundamental issue where everybody tends to brown nose them, but female brown nosing sometimes gets misinterpreted as flirtation and interest.

And because guys in these sorts of positions actually do get an overpowered amount of real interest from women, they may have a harder time detecting inauthentic interest-alias than say a random janitor guy who a woman is being artificially nice to for some reason.

And then if the guy mistakenly thinks the woman is interested and makes a move, the woman may then in the moment feel unsure about what to do, because an abrupt rejection that contradicts their earlier outward behavior may make them feel not good, they might feel like they caused it, etc (which I think lines up with accounts I’ve read, except they don’t mention the brown nosing part of the theorized pattern).

This doesn’t excuse anything, necessarily, I just wonder if there are some complex dynamics at play. This setup we have where sexual relations are at will, subject only to consent, is not that old, so it wouldn’t be surprising if the system as-is still produces very bad outcomes at times even if the parties involved are all behaving in a non-psychopathic way.

9 comments

pfannkuchen

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socalgal2  9 hours ago

You might want to go read the actual accusations. One woman said Lasseter felt her up under the table at meeting(s).

  • pfannkuchen  4 hours ago

    I’m not sure how that goes against what I said? If the man is confused and thinks the woman is very interested in him (again because he is confused), that could absolutely happen. I guarantee it’s happened in other cases where the two have gone on to happily date or marry. The only difference would be that in those cases the man wasn’t confused about the woman’s interest.

onion2k  11 hours ago

The problem with your hypothesis is that 'a woman being nice to you' (brown-nosing or otherwise) is in absolutely no way whatsoever flirting. Flirting is an entirely different way of behaving.

  • b112  9 hours ago

    Thank you for verifying how all women behave and act, as if they are all identical.

    Then, using that stereotypical behaviour to chastise others.

    You also presume that "brown nosing" is the same category as "being nice". It's not. Brown nosing is a non-genuine, fabricated expression.

    So is the woman faking "being nice" due to brow nosing, or faking "being nice" due to sexual interest?

    The parent poster was merely wondering if this is hard to discern, and even indicated that it "doesn't make it right".

    Your response is part of what is wrong with such dynamics today. Knee jerk reactions to speculation is not called for.

  • pfannkuchen  4 hours ago

    Did you miss where I said “misinterpreted”?

    Men also sometimes misinterpret waitresses as flirting with them when they aren’t, which is another common entry point for sexual harassment. What I’m describing would be similar to that. Would you say that doesn’t happen either, or are they somehow completely different?