Comment by brailsafe
1 day ago
It's hard. I take concerta and have been laid off or fired more times than most people I know in long-term employment have had jobs. I take Concerta and drink Coffee, but I mostly just enjoy the coffee. It's really hard to stay on track sometimes, it's really hard to go too long without working on something inherently interesting to me. I'm constantly late and prefer late nights, I tend to always have a bad sleep cycle.
Really basic things that other people seem good at, I struggle. Taxes, finances, anything that requires ambient awareness of systems that have no clear feedback loops. Sometimes penalties for trivial things accumulate and it costs a lot of money. Goals, unless they're something like literally climbing a mountain, don't really motivate me. I don't have any financial or life goals at all, they seem artificial and silly.
Without stimulants, and a thankfully somewhat lenient company/client atm, I'd be screwed.
The positive is that I seem to be much better at making friends than most other people I know, and enjoy a variety of interesting hobbies. I'm also not that fearful or anxious about trying new things.
In terms of who I listen to about the topic, it's certainly not any entrepreneur types, it's mostly friends. Though Trevor Noah has a great podcast on the topic last April
https://pca.st/episode/19d903d2-bb2b-4213-837e-89a1af706ea0
Additionally, I cope by exclusion. I don't obligate myself to many things or events, and refuse to participate in group chats. I keep almost no notifications on, and people know that if they need my attention, they can just call me, otherwise I won't respond until I get around to it. I only buy gifts when I find inspiration to, and try not to spread myself too thin.
I also try to avoid easy things as much as possible. I failed at easy assignments, easy exams in school, why bother going through the rote motions for no other purpose than to be measured on my performance in doing them?
Oof. I feel this.
Especially the "easy things" bit. What an absolute waste of my time and focus to waste on trivial things that will just be measured against some standard, stale rubric.
Busy work for myself and the person receiving it.
But then, I tend to blow the scope of things I have to do in order to make it seem more important. And that means I extend "deadlines" or take longer to complete things. Oh well.
Part of accepting my ADHD is accepting that there is some truth to the feelings, that is, the notion of deadlines and urgency is usually so phony and unnecessary. My brain, my soul knows that something due at 5pm can absolutely be turned in the next day at 8am and nothing in the world will change.
> But then, I tend to blow the scope of things I have to do in order to make it seem more important. And that means I extend "deadlines" or take longer to complete things. Oh well.
Yep I do this too, in ways that would be absolutely comical to a normal person.
> Part of accepting my ADHD is accepting that there is some truth to the feelings, that is, the notion of deadlines and urgency is usually so phony and unnecessary. My brain, my soul knows that something due at 5pm can absolutely be turned in the next day at 8am and nothing in the world will change.
Yes, although it's helpful in some situations, most modern everyday systems have no intrinsically urgent or important timelines or consequences. The effect is hard to relate to anyone who panics for exams. There's been moments where my brain just knows the test I'm taking has no bearing on my future, and I'll just space out because it provokes no useful stress response.
People don't appreciate how much of their ability to be successful at work comes down to innate anxiety about what usually amounts to bullshit.