Comment by sgarland
1 day ago
> Sometimes such team members learn to adapt their approach while holding onto their ideals, and they become valued colleagues.
What's frustrating (I've said that a lot, I know) to me is that my skills are seen as valued, but my opinions aren't. I also have a pathological need to help people, and so when someone asks me, I can't help but patiently explain for the Nth time how a B+tree works (I include docs! I've written internal docs at varying levels!) and why their index design won't work. This is usually met with "Thanks!" because I've solved their problem, until the next problem occurs. When I then point out that they have a systemic issue, and point to the incidents proving this, they don't want to hear it, because that turns "I made an error, and have fixed it" into "I have made a deep architectural mistake," and people apparently cannot stand to be wrong.
That also baffles me - I don't think I'm arrogant or conceited; when I'm wrong, I publicly say so, and explain precisely where I was mistaken, what the correct answer is, and provide references. Being wrong isn't a moral failing, or even necessarily an indictment on your skills, but for some reason, people are deathly afraid to admit they were wrong.
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