Comment by madaxe_again

This stuff cuts both ways. We talk in terms of “men this, women that”, but the reality is much closer to “people”.

In the past, societal norms provided a lot of shelter for the shitty behaviour of men - and they still do - but it doesn’t follow that men have a monopoly on shitty behaviour.

My reality is full time stay at home parent, sole breadwinner, chef, handyman, school and holiday organiser, and being constantly lectured about My Part in the Patriarchy.

I don’t see this as an indictment of women. I see it as an indictment of my chosen partner, and my decision making in this category.

And there’s the rub. As long as we categorise behaviour by gender, we’ll perpetuate a dynamic that permits shitty behaviour with gender as an excuse.