Comment by noduerme
2 hours ago
Maybe I'm speaking from "survivor bias", but I'm bit offended by your clinically framed attempt to pathologize my upbringing here.
I never said that we weren't loved or that basic affection was withheld.
We were expected to do beyond what we thought was our best, or else we would be disappointments to our parents. Would they still love us? Sure. Kick us out...? Not unless our responses involved gross insubordination. But we were called to explain ourselves as one would in a court of law.
What was at stake, and this is what I think you may misapprehend, was not parental love. It was parental respect.
In order for that to function, you actually have to love them and know that they love you. Otherwise you wouldn't give a shit whether they respected you.
Which is why withdrawing respect at times is not abuse, it's teaching someone how to conduct themselves.
> your clinically framed attempt to pathologize my upbringing here.
Don't bring your dog collars around then
> as one would in a court of law.
such as this loud symptom, if you don't want the shame of it to outlive you. It's what you're looking for in fact. Your highly disagreeable post, followed by the very reasonable replies you wrote to the reactions it caused, is a hint you're still looking for that kind of stimulation. It's a form of self-punishment.