Comment by Thedarkb

I grew up in an environment where I had high expectations placed on me with a father who was mortally disappointed when I failed to meet them, but the reality was that, even when I gave my all, I still couldn't be what my father expected me to be because I had undiagnosed ADHD which has obvious implications for educational performance which was complicated by the fact I had undiagnosed (until a teacher picked up on it when I was 15 and referred me) dyspraxia and was physically incapable of writing fast enough to finish exam papers in time. I was permanently stressed from roughly the age of 7 until I left home at 20 and it did enough damage that I had to be referred from the ordinary mental health service to a specialist at the beginning of the year. Your tone is very similar to that of my father, and I'm sure for many kids this parenting style is productive, but if you think this kind of treatment isn't equally capable of producing generational trauma as physical violence, you're lying to yourself. I hope for their sake that your children never find themselves in a position where they can't meet your expectations.