Comment by snapetom

Wow, this strongly resonates with me, especially the tieback to Asian cultures. I was both told many times, and shown by example many times, that it was rude to put someone in awkward positions. I still carry that to this day in personal relationships, and my wife (white, US-born) doesn't understand why I don't just ask for things from our families/friends, often going to great lengths to avoid questions.

However, at work, I am definitely an "ask" person. I'm in engineer that has spent a lot of time with sales people. "Make them say no" is a mantra I use at work. It's more forward, more aggressive, and American corporate culture, often necessary.