Comment by satisfice

This is not just moving but helpful.

Many years ago, being newly married, I worried about my vulnerability in case my wife died. So one night, while away from her on a business trip, I tried to imagine and fathom her potential death. I was able to do this— or I should say I BEGAN to be able to do it, when to my alarm I felt my mind beginning to detach from her.

I realized from this exercise that the price of love is grief. Grief cannot be minimized or habituated without sacrificing what makes living wonderful.

I have now been married 32 years and have a 30-year old son whom I am equally besotted with. I am fully aware that the death of either of them will vaporize me as I know me. It is a black wall. I can’t and I won’t fathom life without them.

I will simply pay the price.