Comment by jyunwai

I believe this is one of life's questions where there is no right answer. I've lived from the alternative perspective: I decided to stay closer to home to be near my parents. But my decision isn't necessarily the right one for every person. I've spoken with older individuals who regretted missing out on professional and personal opportunities that they could have explored in another country, and their experiences inform my response.

A principle I've tried to follow is to minimize regrets over one's life. In your case, it sounds like you will live with the full experience of moving to a new place—you won't have the regrets expressed by some who didn't move away. Some people who give up opportunities out of passiveness have grown to truly regret that decision. In my situation, closeness to parents was one of several reasons: if it were the only one, it’s likely I would have regretted not taking an alternate path.

You can also call your parents often over the phone or video. I was very close to a person who moved to the opposite side of the globe from the person’s parents for more than five years, but spent a lot of time video calling them (nearly every day). The person confided in them and talked about plenty of subjects. This person truly has a great relationship with them: I wouldn't be surprised if the topics of conversations were often deeper than those with my own parents, despite being half a world away.

It also may not be too late to move later in life (though understandably, sometimes there are barriers, such as a partner who can't easily move, or restrictions in either country that make a move difficult). Many people in my country move to the US to earn money and gain experience, then decide to move back home after a number of years to raise children and care for family members. From another perspective, I've known other people who moved to my country, then worked with immigration services to bring their family to move with them.

Though I don't know your parents, they might also have regretted or been heartbroken if you gave up on your dreams or plans in life just to stay closer to them. If I were to become a parent one day, I would also hope my children would similarly be able to live a full life, even if that meant an empty nest at home.

I think it's good that you are actively considering the question. A future step may not involve any person moving in the future, but a starting point could involve deepening the relationship with your parents by calling them and sharing more about your life.