Did you feel like this before having kids as well?
I am vehemently against the concept of getting kids (that is, when it comes to myself; you do you) and sometimes hear people say that they reasoned the same way until they actually had kids. My only question then is how they ended up having kids? Sure, mistakes can happen, but for someone like me to have kids would be like someone who said they really, really never wanted to go to India to somehow end up there.
What I’m trying to say is that there probably is a self-selection bias going on here: People who says that getting children gives you purpose are probably people who were quite positive towards the idea of getting them in the first place. But does that mean it is good advice for people in general, including people who are very skeptical? What other activity/life goal works this way? Lifting weights at the gym? Going on a trip around the world? Trying BDSM?
If it weren’t for my kids and my wife, I would’ve blown the money and ended up in poverty or something.
My heart goes out to people raising young ones in today’s world. Seems like things have only gotten harder and more confusing for young parents compared when my babies were young. We didn’t even HAVE smartphones when they were small.
Yeah; I have 2 kids in their 20s and 2 in elementary school, and can attest that all the "shiny tech" has made it so much more difficult for parents to raise kids. And their future is so much more uncertain and _not_ in a good way. I look around and don't see much effort into building a better world for our children. There's global issues like "how will climate change affect my kids when they're in their 40s trying to raise kids of their own", but closer to home there's more personal questions like "what should I encourage my child to learn or study when AI could plausibly take over many careers that seemed solid", not to mention that unless you are rich (which we're not), the cost of college is frightening (you want your kid to be able to go to a good college if they can get in, but not be saddled with debt on the way out; my elder daughter got a full academic ride in engineering but not everyone has those capabilities), and just the competition to get in is so much greater than it was. No regrets as my youngest are wonderful human beings, but so much more anxiety as a parent than 20-25 years ago :/
Did you feel like this before having kids as well?
I am vehemently against the concept of getting kids (that is, when it comes to myself; you do you) and sometimes hear people say that they reasoned the same way until they actually had kids. My only question then is how they ended up having kids? Sure, mistakes can happen, but for someone like me to have kids would be like someone who said they really, really never wanted to go to India to somehow end up there.
What I’m trying to say is that there probably is a self-selection bias going on here: People who says that getting children gives you purpose are probably people who were quite positive towards the idea of getting them in the first place. But does that mean it is good advice for people in general, including people who are very skeptical? What other activity/life goal works this way? Lifting weights at the gym? Going on a trip around the world? Trying BDSM?
You’re absolutely right.
If it weren’t for my kids and my wife, I would’ve blown the money and ended up in poverty or something.
My heart goes out to people raising young ones in today’s world. Seems like things have only gotten harder and more confusing for young parents compared when my babies were young. We didn’t even HAVE smartphones when they were small.
Yeah; I have 2 kids in their 20s and 2 in elementary school, and can attest that all the "shiny tech" has made it so much more difficult for parents to raise kids. And their future is so much more uncertain and _not_ in a good way. I look around and don't see much effort into building a better world for our children. There's global issues like "how will climate change affect my kids when they're in their 40s trying to raise kids of their own", but closer to home there's more personal questions like "what should I encourage my child to learn or study when AI could plausibly take over many careers that seemed solid", not to mention that unless you are rich (which we're not), the cost of college is frightening (you want your kid to be able to go to a good college if they can get in, but not be saddled with debt on the way out; my elder daughter got a full academic ride in engineering but not everyone has those capabilities), and just the competition to get in is so much greater than it was. No regrets as my youngest are wonderful human beings, but so much more anxiety as a parent than 20-25 years ago :/