Comment by buttocks
8 days ago
Life with young children is actually mostly dreary and stressful; the fun and excitement and reliving of childhood memories is 1% or less of life, in my experience. By time I realize I am having that <1% experience it is over. I still feel as though I am chasing after something vanishing and never catching it.
I didn't find that to be true. It might depend somewhat on the individual children. Your individual stress level is largely under your own control.
Physical Health, mental health, the economy, social disorder, family; we can influence these things that cause stress but often we can't "control" them.
You can't necessarily control external events. But you can, to a significant degree, control the effect those things have on your chronic stress levels. This requires cultivating a certain level of maturity and mental discipline.
I am sorry that this is your experience. A newborn brings in so much responsibility and unknowns and there is no rest - as with anything with a lot of responsibility, unknowns and no rest, it can cause tremendous amount of stress.
For centuries we lived in large families and those within communities where everyone witnessed birth at home with multiple siblings and responsibilities around raising children from a small age. The current atomic families with two adult both completely inexperienced in raising a child is unprecedented in history.
I agree that reliving memories is not a large part, though it is impactful. But it's not dreary ... large part is also having fun and good time with your kids.