Comment by ajkjk

3 days ago

the copy on this page is so grating. not uncommon but man can't anything just be sincere instead of fake marketing bullshit?

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ajkjk

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peteforde  2 days ago

I'm genuinely curious what a site designed to sell a niche, enthusiast camera could say that wouldn't be "fake marketing bullshit". Could you take a stab at how you would approach designing a sincere sales site for a product like this.

What qualifies as sincere? Who decides?

  • ajkjk  2 days ago

    It's so easy. Off the top of my head:

    "Discover the worlds hidden in every moment with WideluxX™" -> "Take sweeping panaromic analog photos with WideLux"

    "The WideluxX™ is not a nostalgic return to the past. It exists alongside contemporary tools, offering a different way to create." -> this is AI slop, but still, you could say "We've updated analog film technology with the absolute best in modern engineering" (assuming that's factually true)

    "A Contemporary Tool, Not a Retro Gesture" also AI slop, something like "A contemporary version of a beloved retro style" or something is factual and earnest.

    "Each WideluxX™ image is created in a single continuous exposure, capturing space and time as they unfold, right in front of your eyes." -> "Single continuous exposures panaromas over (whatever aspect ratio / etc) which split the difference between photographs and short films, giving the appearance of active motion" (or whatever, I didn't read too much about what it actually does)

    "Who's it for? WideluxX™ is for photographers who enjoy shaping an image through timing, movement, and perspective — and for those drawn to finely made mechanical cameras." -> this is alright, but not great; I'd prefer it to be less fluffy, like "WideLux is for lovers of finely-made mechanical cameras and film photography who want to play with a new style of photography that opens up new artistic opportunities.

    "Working with WideluxX™ means allowing space for surprise—images shaped by light, movement, and the unfolding moment." -> ugh. just delete this entirely.

    "Designed to endure, the WideluxX™ can be adjusted, repaired, and restored—much like a mechanical watch." no shit it's mechanical of course it can be. this one isn't terrible but it's not great. delete the "designed to endure" (and de-sloppify it a bit)

    also personal preference but having "^tm" on everything cheapens the hell out of it. I'm sure there's some sketchy legal reason for it but it looks stupid and makes everything feel plastic and corporate.

    Anyway, the trick (which is not a trick) is to write things that are true and sincere and treat the reader like a human being. If you wouldn't say something to someone's face without them wanting to punch you, don't write it on your website. If you don't have factual things to say that make people want to buy your product, make a better product. No opinion about whether this is better for sales funnels, don't even care. But it will make me respect the company more.

    • peteforde  2 days ago

      That's actually a pretty great answer. Thanks!

      I believe that you made your point, and yet I also still think it's not a binary. There's certainly room for more flowery, metaphor-driven descriptions in marketing even if it's not as bluntly spec-driven as you'd prefer. For a lot of customer demos, it's trying to strike the right balance between intimidating and approachable.

      I do think that people need to chill out on the knee-jerk declarations of AI slop every time something isn't as tight and poetic as they'd like. I remember (and am still bothered by) commercials in the 90s showing eg smiling moms shaking empty McCain frozen French fry bags upside down to illustrate how they are so desirable, you literally can't have enough of them.

      In other words, what you're uptight about is not slop so much as late stage capitalism.

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