Comment by miroljub
1 day ago
> Your assumption is reductive and self-absorbed.
This is a good example of productive direct communication without sugarcoating. I find it much more productive, for both human and LLM interaction, than something like:
"I wonder if that view might be oversimplifying a complex situation and focusing mostly on how it relates to you. There may be some other angles worth exploring."
or
"I think there might be a bit more nuance to consider here, and it could help to look at it from a wider perspective beyond personal experience."
> Obnoxious people have repeatedly shown to be detrimental to productivity at the organizational level.
You confused directness and openness with obnoxiousness here. The issue with many orgs is they foster fakeness and beating around the bush in an attempt not to offend the easily offended people. This trend also infected the companies from countries with way more direct culture in an attempt to accommodate people from indirect cultures.
You’ve conflated two things:
1. Saying that an answer may be too simplistic and a more nuanced view is warranted.
2. Saying that an answer is both reductive and self-absorbed
One opens the door to many possibilities, and invites deeper thinking.
Two asserts that you know for a fact that the answer is wrong that it’s wrong because of a character flaw.
I’m a huge fan of directness, but it is a very different thing from omniscience.
A direct version of 2 would be: “that approach loses important nuance, like [example]. Give it another go?”
No… the way I said it was actually deliberately obnoxious— the appropriate direct workplace response would be: “that seems oversimplified. I disagree. Here’s why:”
Calling you self-absorbed added nothing of substance to the comment. It was an assumption about your mental state and a judgement of your intent based on that. There was no factual analysis or actionable insight. It was just one person explicitly stating that they feel the other person is dumber or maybe less mentally disciplined. It turned valid, direct feedback into an insult. It is exactly the type of thing that alienates people for no benefit beyond pumping up the speaker’s ego.
> Your assumption is reductive and self-absorbed.
Bullshit. You never insulted me personally. You used strong words to disagree with my assumption, which is an important difference. It's not an insult and was not obnoxious.
But I can fully understand why a person coming from an indirect culture where any criticism is taken personally would be offended and call HR overlords to punish the person giving honest opinions. That inevitably leads to people taking more care in how than what is said, and that is detrimental to innovation and progress, where you need to be at 100% focus. That's why a few close friends talking and scolding openly in a garage regularly beat corporate behemoths full of people spending a day figuring out how not to offend anyone (or how to offend someone without being punished).
> That's why a few close friends talking and scolding openly in a garage regularly beat corporate behemoths full of people spending a day figuring out how not to offend anyone (or how to offend someone without being punished).
Literally not why lol you absolute dreamer
Normally people who back this "I can talk how I like to people cos I'm being honest" are either genuinely autistic and can't read emotions, or they have just had a shitty homelife, parents or upbringing. I suspect you're the second.
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