Comment by werrett

Funny how 5yo needs sanding down, 15yo you need power tools like grinder, 30yo needs explosives to take ego down like major life event, death of close one or their own close call.

I feel like the solution here is to say 'Try'?

> but have you had small children?

I have indeed.

> The main problem with having a 5yo is more generally sanding down their ego. “no bud you can’t swim. not well. yet” and “I think you probably have some more to learn about chess. no I don’t think you can beat me.”

I don't think you've understood my post at all.

If, as you say, you have to spend that amount of time adjusting expectations, which I too have had to do with children, adults, and managers alike, then, if you understand my post, you would do that in a way that teaches them that adjustments don't have to come with ridicule, or cause for fear.

The suggestion that you don't steer the children toward understanding that there are limitations to the world (including their own abilities) is the complete reverse of my post - the opposite is what I am saying, I even explicitly mention telling your child that "there will always be some things that nobody knows yet"

In fact, I would go further, teaching your child that there will be times that they fail, but can come to you with their head held high because they learnt from that experience, is what safety is all about.